Getting old?

Two old men were sitting in the yard outside the old people's home one day when Tim turned to the other and said "John I'm really feeling my age today I just hurt all over, how you are feeling?"

John replied "I feel just like a new born baby"

Tim looked at him startled "A new born baby, really?"

"Yep, I have no hair, no teeth, and I think I just wet my pants."

The Blind Man -- A True Story

A man was flying from Seattle to San Francisco. Unexpectedly, the plane stopped in Sacramento along the way. The flight attendant explained that there would be a delay, and if the passengers wanted to get off the aircraft, the plane would re-board in 50 minutes.

Everybody got off the plane except one gentleman who was blind.

The man had noticed him as he walked by and could tell the gentleman was blind because his Seeing Eye dog lay quietly underneath the seats in front of him throughout the entire flight. He could also tell he had flown this very flight before because the pilot approached him, and calling him by name, said, "Keith, we're in Sacramento for almost an hour. Would you like to get off and stretch your legs?"

The blind man replied, "No thanks, but maybe my dog would like to stretch his legs."

All the people in the gate area came to a complete standstill when they looked up and saw the pilot walk off the plane with a Seeing Eye dog!

The pilot was even wearing sunglasses. People scattered. They not only tried to change planes, but they were trying to change airlines!

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Something Special!

A stupid joke

Isn’t it strange that sometimes the most stupid joke is the one that genuine makes you laugh?

Here is such a one – it made me laugh, genuine laughing when I read it.

Enjoy!!

A salesman telephone a household, and a four-year-old answered.

Salesman: May I speak to your mother?

Child: She is not here.

Salesman: Well, is anyone else there?

Child: My sister

Salesman: O.K., fine. May I speak to her?

Child: I guess so.

There was a long silence on the other phone. Then;

Child: Hello?

Salesman: It’s you. I thought you were going to call your sister.

Child: I did. The trouble is: I can’t get her out of the playpen.

Perfume can make you sexy

Jenny Love